Monday, August 25, 2014

Eventful weekend. Emotional meltdown when grandson started crying. Autistic four year old. He ran to me and I held him and sang "his" song to him: Jesus Loves Me. He stopped crying. I started and didn't stop for a long time.

Saturday was interesting. Went to KMart. Donna's parents were visiting and they like that store. I was standing near the check-out line and a woman in an electric-motor shopping cart tapped me on the arm. "Do you need this cart? I'll stand if you need it," she said with a worried voice. I politely declined. At least I think I did.

Sunday I awoke from a dream with urgency. Something out of Dr. Who, which never impressed me. So I thought. Friends were helping me move. Loading things, more things than I own, into the back of a camper-shell covered pickup. From inside it was bigger than my living room but from outside it was a small bed pickup. A hail storm started. I searched for Donna's parents to make sure they got out of the storm. That woke me up. I remembered that they would be loading their car to go home this morning. Hurrying to put my jeans on and help them, I stumbled more than I am right now trying to type straight.

I was no help. Too dizzy and clumsy. Went back to bed after they left. I had my instant nap where it was 30 minutes later when I opened my eyes a minute after closing them. Amazing change. Not dizzy, clear-headed, alert.

This morning, Monday, when my alarm went off I shut off my CPAP and rolled over. That instant nap was a little over an hour. I felt fine but dizziness crept up. I had trouble focusing. I almost lost my balance (I was typing away and realized that no letters were appearing--I do hope that was a computer glitch and not me). Balance, yes, while trying to bring my face to see the numbers. Then I turned to go elsewhere in the kitchen and thought I was about to fall because I missed the doorway when I tried to catch myself but grabbed just as I was going down. I covered the bowl of left-over gravy and went to heat it up, but opened the refrigerator door instead of the microwave.

I didn't want to write this but felt like I needed to try. Too much and too long. I didn't want some of this to simply fall into the empty holes.